Brené Brown said this well, when she told Oprah this, “It’s important that we find friends that love us not despite our imperfection but because of it. The move the body friends. To look for the folks who are going to show up and wade through the deep with us. Often times, we steamroll over those people to get the attention and approval of people who will never show up for us like that. Trying to please or prove ourselves to them. It’s hard to practice compassion when we are struggling with our own authenticity or when our own worthiness is off balance.”
Everybody needs at-least 1-2 move your body friends in their lives, and on #nationalbestfriendday I am reflectiong on those friendships and praying that we all cherish those types of folks in our lives, and if we don’t have them, I pray we notice when they show up even when they don’t come dressed in the package we expect.
One lesson a friend told me years ago that has stuck with me since is that, “some friends are roses (they are super pretty, but only last for a season, when winter aka tough times arise they literally can’t withstand the “temperature” change), some friends are evergreens (last through all seasons) and often times those evergreens don’t come in the package we expect them too”. Essentially she was saying how we can be so particular about who we want around us and sometimes miss out on really dope relationships because those people don’t “fit” what we envision as the right people or shoot person. I say person because I think that’s applicable to the standards we place on finding that special someone (I’m guilty). None the less, I needed to hear that statement at the time. Moral of the post, cherish the evergreens and for what it’s worth, appreciate the roses. You’re welcome. 😉
Written January 12th, 2013
A scratched CD.
A word used to describe when life plays on repeat.
I thought I’d try changing the song a few times but the more I try the bigger the scratches become on me.
I’ve become weary of these songs.
I’ve been singing the same melodies, hoping to find some lost value.
It’s not quite platinum and it’s definitely not gold.
But the fact that others have joined in on the beat, hitting repeat, leaving more scratches on me…
Makes me want to go back to an unopened case.
It’s hard, since their songs seem to dance in unison with this…
Like putting in a blank CD with no title, hoping to find the sweet melodies of a love song.
And all you hear is the blues.
So you change the track hoping to hear something new.
You shouldn’t have to change the beat, again.
As the intro looks nice but the song ends up being the same…
Give the ear a melody it can dance to and stop waiting for it to change the pace.
I left this track on repeat for so long because it’s the only tune that feels safe.
It’s getting old.
Not matching the rhythm.
Melodies singing a different song.
Songs slightly off beat.
Attracting a crowd.
Some composers I’d rather not speak on.
Notes compiled together in a complex rhythmic tone.
It’s hard to read.
But I’m managing to dance along.
You never stand alone,
To just listen,
To the beat.
Of my heart.
I fight alone.
1. The Fine Art of Friendship (Clayton King)
2. Beyond Boundaries: Learning to Trust Again in Relationships by Dr. John Townsend
3. Boundaries by Brene Brown via The Work of the People